“We should always try to see the duty of others through their own eyes, and never judge the customs of other people by our own standards.”
— Swami Vivekananda
The visitor who bellows at the security guard who asks for his details. The woman who constantly haggles with vegetable vendors. The man who shouts at the waiter because the soup is not hot. Would they behave the same way with their peers or seniors? Not at all.
Then why do they treat people they don’t consider equal poorly? The answer is ego (ahamkāra). Ego doesn’t just make people nasty, it also limits the possibilities of life that they experience.
Each of us is doing the duty allotted to us by our birth, by our position in society, and by our potential at that moment. That doesn’t dictate what we’re capable of; how committed we are to our duty does. “A shoemaker who can turn out a strong, nice pair of shoes in the shortest possible time is a better man, according to his profession and his work, than a professor who talks nonsense every day of his life,” Swamiji wrote.
The next time you think you’re better than someone, remind yourself that ahamkāra is getting the better of you. Make a conscious choice to put yourself in their shoes and understand why they do what they do.
Treat people with respect and love. Build humility and empathy before life forces you to learn them the hard way.