Persistent or Stubborn?

“Where there is a want there cannot be discernment. You crave happiness; you look for means to get it. Someone offers you the means. Now your mind-heart is so blinded by the intense desire for blindness that it is incapable of discernment. Though you may think you’re analyzing and examining the means offered to you, yet this deep craving for satisfaction, happiness, security prevents clarity of comprehension. So where there is a want there cannot be true discernment.” — J. Krishnamurti

Do you know what the difference between persistence and stubbornness is? On the surface, it seems like a fine line. Harry Heltzer, the former chairman of the 3M board, said, “If you’re successful, you’re called persistent; if you aren’t, you’re stubborn. But, while you’re doing it, nobody can tell the difference.”

But dig beneath that surface and the difference between them turns out to be more than just luck. People can tell the difference.

As VC Paul Graham wrote in an insightful essay, “The persistent are attached to their goal. The obstinate are attached to their ideas about how to reach it.” Here are a few more differences between the two kinds of people.

When presented with a new idea, persistent people choose to understand. “Tell me more,” they say. But stubborn people resist; they instantly reject any idea that doesn’t appeal to them.

Persistent people look for better ways to do the same things; stubborn people refuse to adapt. The former also value others’ inputs, including books, interviews, art, and other forms of inspiration. But the latter… (Nowhere is this more apparent than disagreements. Persistent people will pay more attention when you disagree with them—they want to know if they are wrong, and where. But stubborn people zone out if you tell them there’s a hole in their ship. They don’t want to hear about it.)

So, how do you respond to new ideas? What are you doing now that you were not doing six months ago, no matter how small? How much external input has inspired your current way of working and living? (Input matters insofar it yields positive results.)

Finally, after reading the above questions, will you take a good, hard look in the mirror? Or will you say, “I’m already doing everything right. It’s others who need to learn this.”

You will be wrong many times. To err is human, but so is being able to correct it.

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