Filling The Emptiness In Your Life

“When you really become aware that no one can fulfill you, can give you full completeness, except through your own comprehension, then you put up with minor details . . . Then, the question, choice, of whether to stay or leave does not arise.”

— J. Krishnamurti

A woman asked Krishnamurthi for advice because she felt emotionally dissatisfied. The reason? There was no understanding between her husband and her, but he was ill so she couldn’t leave him.

In his trademark style, Krishnamurthi didn’t tell her what to do. Instead, he asked her to reflect on why she felt dissatisfied. Did she rely on her husband for sufficiency and he didn’t supply it? Did she want to offer him sufficiency but he didn’t accept it? Or did she just not like him anymore? In other words, did she expect her husband to fill the emptiness in her life?

Similar situations occur in our lives too. We try to fill the emptiness in our lives by clinging to people or things. We get friendly with people quickly, we jump into relationships, or we go out of our way to help others.

Here’s the thing about emptiness: the more you sweep it under the carpet, the stronger it grows. And when the relationship ruptures (because it was formed for the wrong reasons), the emptiness turns into a huge monster and you’re left with nowhere to hide.

Purpose, not people, is what can fulfill you. As Mark Twain said, “The two most important days in your life are the day you were born and the day you find out why.” Discovering why you were born and fulfilling it – that’s your purpose.

When you work on your purpose, you become complete in yourself. Then, you also become complete in every relationship, bringing your best to it.

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